How long should you wait before meeting someone online? How many emails should you exchange before seeing someone for the first time? The answer might surprise you.
Benefits of Waiting For A Long Time and Exchanging Lots Of Emails.
- If you're shy, you can take your time before meeting people.
- If you're recently divorced, separated, or still married, you might not be ready for dating and exchanging lots of emails may distract you from the emotional trauma you're presently experiencing.
- If you're concerned about safety, you may want to exchange several emails and research their background first.
- You should exchange lots of emails if you believe email will save you time and help you find a romantic partner faster.
- You should write many emails if you believe that you can experience chemistry with a real person that you've never met before.
- You should write a lot of emails if you like long distance relationships and meeting right away is not practical.
Having said all of the above, here's the far more effective way to do online dating.
Meet People Right Away!
The majority of experienced singles will tell you that is exchanging emails is a big waste of time and there is no way of knowing if you'll feel any connection, spark, or chemistry until you meet someone in person.
Here's what usually happens to people who exchange a lot of emails before meeting for a first date. Their expectations become exaggerated. Some singles actually feel they're falling love with someone they haven't met before. All they have is a profile, picture, and a lots of emails. The first date usually ends up being a disaster, because your expectations are so high but the real person isn't even close to what you pictured in your mind.
Five Minutes With Someone In Person Is Worth More Than A Thousand Emails
If a picture is worth a 'thousand' words, meeting someone in person for a few minutes is worth at least a thousand emails as well. Online dating is more fun and productive when you meet people right away. You'll see results much quicker. Exchange a couple of emails and suggest a meeting at the local coffee shop for fifteen minutes max. Why? Because you don't know anything about your first date. You might like them, but maybe not. If you meet for dinner or commit to a long date, you could be in a extremely uncomfortable position for a very long time. On the other hand, if you really like someone you can 'cancel your plans' and spend more time with them. The other option would be to make arrangements for a longer date when both of you have more time.
After you've met someone in person and you feel a spark or some chemistry, you can keep in touch by email or on the phone in addition to dating. That's fine and the right way to do it. Meet people first. Email later.
What About Dating Safety?
Every time you leave your house, you meet strangers. You don't know who they are. It's just as safe as meeting anyone at the coffee shop, a store, or any other public place. Use your intuition. Don't give your phone number out, address, or any personal information until you're convinced it's safe to do so. When you leave your first date make sure you're not being followed. And always meet at a busy public location. You can also bring a friend along if you like. It's just a first date and only for 15 minutes.
What About Saving Time With Email?
Experienced singles will tell you that email is a big waste of time unless you've met someone before and like them. Even then you're better of talking on the phone or going out on dates than focusing on an email relationship.
Another consideration is who are you dealing with? If you're exchanging lots of emails and haven't met someone how do you know they are who they say they are? Are they 60 years old pretending to be 40? Are they 12 years old pretending to be 21? What sex are they? Even if you have picture, it may not be what they really look like.
It's possible to fall in love with someone by writing a lot of emails and then meeting them but it's also possible to be struck by lightning. The fact of the matter is that even though online dating is an excellent way to meet people and start new friendships, you'll save a lot of time meeting people as soon as possible. If you like their profile, picture, and first couple of emails, why wait? By meeting them in person you can quickly narrow down your list of people you'd like to date.
Online Dating Tips About Email and Meeting Someone For The First Time.
Remember that some people are excellent writers and say all the right things by email. It's easy to be attracted to them. However they may not be what you're looking for when you finally meet them. On the other hand someone might be a terrible writer and say all the wrong things in their profile or in their emails. You might easily write them off as a 'loser'. Yet if you met this exact same person at a party or through a friend, it might be love at first sight!
If someone wants to take their time and exchange a lot of emails before meeting you, it should be a red flag to you. Why don't they want to meet you right away? Are they hiding something? Are they still married? Are they older than they say they are? Are they ready for a real relationship? Perhaps they are. Maybe this person is just shy and you're looking for a shy person. In that case you might want to invest valuable time with lots of email.
Think of this. If you go to a singles event filled with 500 people and look around the room, how many people might you be interested in? One, maybe two or three? The majority of these people probably have nice profiles online somewhere. If you rely on internet dating to find new relationships, chances are you'll need to meet many people before you find the right one. That's why it's best to meet right away.
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